India: A country of god fearing people. A place on the earth where to have a kid, couples prefer putting 5000 rupees into the 'daan peti’ instead of putting efforts on bed. A country where to make money, you just have to be in a piece of saffron colored cloth.

Undoubtedly, India has changed a lot. From last few decades, this one thing has not changed a bit; worshiping self-proclaimed demigods. There are many cases where we have seen that how these self-proclaimed messengers manipulate us by using the name of god. We have seen that how they misuse our devotional feelings or what you can say; fear of god. But still after all those MMSs, sting operations and their involvement in other illegal activities, we follow them blindly by putting all those educations and certificates of excellence inside our a**.

Sometimes, questions arise in my mind about these charismatic gurus: Who initiated this no loss only profit business? Where they come from? Who teach them? What makes them think that they are a demigod? Most importantly what they think before putting themselves in such a pathetic dress code; goggle, gold-plated watch, designer jacket from Lajpat Nagar with lots of atta on face.

Dude! If you think that you are changing your attire so to be in with the generation, then there is something you should check – A brain!

Maybe they belong to a hidden institute like – INDIAN INSTITUTE OF SELF-PROCLAIMED DEMIGODS. An institute to produce some high profile a**h***s. People are probably taught how to convert currency out of devotional mind. AHA! There are probably specializations divided according to different gods like; LORD SHANKAR BRANCH, DURGA BRANCH, etc. Of course not every single god. I mean… if we’ll start counting them then undoubtedly these god themselves can settle down a city. So only the important ones; the main avatar! They are probably taught the market value of every god. For example; Illiteracy rate is high in north India, so people worship goddesses Saraswati, an avatar of Durga, to bless them with lots of knowledge and excellence instead of empowering each other for education. So, a god woman will be allocated there, as a demigod of Durga, to serve the north Indian people. North Indians are also very much kind of Superstar Govinda; Kind of stylist, always ready to dance and of course hyper-superstitious. The demigods allocated in North India will also follow the Govinda trend to gain popularity and to grow his/her business. Just like Radhe Maa!

If not institute then there has to be a group like ISIS or Al-Qaeda. ISIS and other terror groups use the power of gun to diffuse terror and dread. This particular demigod group use the power of gods to diffuse fear. A socially accepted anti-social group.

Unfortunately, these self-proclaimed demigods are not products of an institute or a group. They are products of our fear. They are products of our low self-esteem. They are products of our under-confident nature. We think that these people are the only one who can help us get a successful life and prosperity. They are products of these kind of thinking. Why we always have to rely on someone to get what we want? Why we always have to cry on our helplessness? Why don’t we just push ourselves to convert that helplessness into our power? Why we always quit?

We think that these self-proclaimed superhuman can help us in building a connection with god. God, who if exist, is always connected to us. He/she don’t need a medium to be in touch with his/her products i.e., we. Besides, I think he has done his part by gifting us a brain which we can use to get anything which we want or to solve any problem. Then why to rely on him?

But the thing is; who cares! Let’s not take any chance! Let’s not think if these demigods are genuinely demigods. Let’s not think if they live dual lives. On one hand they are into some controversy and on other hand into robbing people openly. Let’s not think if we have that capability to solve our issues or not.

We should follow them by ignoring their involvement in numerous illegal activities, pinky looks, sexuality and desire to be a self-proclaimed celebrity. This will continue and should continue to be successful in life, as hard work and sensibility will never help you get success. But banging head on their doors will definitely.

It was a bright Monday but there was a dark energy all around. I could hear a guy from the other room of my PG crying out loud: YOU CAN'T DO THIS!!!!!

After coming out from my room, all I saw was the common hall filled with people staying in my PG.

'How could they do this?!' *sobbing*

'Its OK man! Honi ko kon taal sakta hai'

'I can't believe we wouldn't be able to see them anymore'

'I don't know anything! What I'll do!? I don't even have a girlfriend!'

'Don't say it man! My hands are getting numb now only!'

'They are useless now!'

I could sense that something went wrong there like someone has died; maybe a friend of them. But I didn't care to ask them about their loss as I was new there and it wouldn't not be appropriate to scratch the wound. So I left and get back to my room where I suddenly realized that it's been now a week, I was ignoring the most important thing which I should do every alternate day to meditate; busy schedule, pressures and all. And besides, its very tough to seek peace and loneliness in PGs where you are living with other people. And to meditate, you should be all alone in peace with no disturbance. So here I was all alone and best time to do meditation, with my laptop and few tissues.

But time was not in my favor...

ERROR: PAGE NOT FOUND

It took me few hours to digest the reality behind this hindrance after flooding of a horrified update, over my phone and social media accounts. I realized then and there that why my roomies were crying and frustrated.

Beef ban... I said nothing.

Censored everything... I said nothing.

You even raised the price of cigarettes... I said nothing!!!

But not this! Not porn sites!! What these porn stars have done to the economy statistics of beloved India and their people. In fact it won't be wrong if I say that they have quite good contribution into its growth: specially to watch porn >> internet connection>> taxes >> growth.

Those days were fascinating with Abella Anderson and Kayden Kross but now.... Ban!!!!

They imposed ban on about 857 porn sites to protect minorities from accessing sexual contents.

Not 1 or 2 or even 100... But 857!!!

Its not their responsibilities towards the young generation of India but the jealousy of unable to enjoy Eva Anderson at their time of turning on.

"OH, WE WERE NOT EVEN ABLE TO CHECK ON THE B***IES IN MACHHALTI JAWAANI AND THAT TOO SECRETLY IN CINEMA HALLS AND THESE MORONS ARE ENJOYING SUNNY LEONE IN NAUGHTY NURSE AT THEIR HOME!? BAN IT!"


I remember the day I first visit one of these wonderlands. It was a trip to Hawaii. I hit the enter button and there I was... more than 100 rides to get on with almost all categories. You name it and there it was. But now it is inaccessible like King has finally destroyed and controlling magical moorland and this time even Maleficent failed to stop him. It was like one day suddenly the wonderland vanished leaving behind lots of Alice crying on their Karma.

Now we were crying and wiping our tears with the same tissue with which once we used to jerk off.

I cannot really imagine what will be the positive consequences of this ban but negative consequences. 

One of which is rate of suicide. Yes, rate of suicide will definitely rise up!

Office/ Exam/ Pressure >> Frustration >> Jerk off >> Relieved and back to the battle.

But now!

Office/ Exam/ Pressure >> Frustration >> PAGE NOT FOUND >> More frustration >> More pressure>> Again PAGE NOT FOUND >> frustration at its height >> Marriage/ suicide.

Another consequence will be,

PAGE NOT FOUND >> No A/V Class of safe and good ways of having sex >> No practical knowledge because no one talks about sex education in our sabhyata se bhari rapists ka desh >> Again frustration >> .....


These hands which were once proud of themselves for doing such a great work, more than even eating and writing, are now feeling numb to its height. Now they will never smile and do work enthusiastically.

They say that it's for our benefits that they imposed ban on Porn sites. Well all I can say that there are a lot of things which should be done for our benefits in our country: poverty, unemployment and all those traditional evils which are actually degrading us from last many decades. So I will definitely give up on my hands the day you will impose ban of those things first which really worth a ban because only banning cuss words, beef, net neutrality and porn sites won't bring the change but imposing the same on corruption and imbalanced system will.

But till the time: One minute silence for Pornhub....

‘Listen ma’am, you don’t really understand my situation. I have to rush from this city as soon as possible and you are eating my bloody time’, Raghav was at his anxiety level when he came to know from the inquiry that he has to wait for the next 20 hours to catch the next flight to Delhi. Though the department could help him in escaping from the city as soon ass possible, but they were bound by the rules and regulations of the flight management, which says that only in the case of emergency they can give a stretch. Raghav’s case was not an emergency one for the department, but for him, it was. It was a question of his life and death. He somewhere knew or assumed that by next 4 hours, he has to leave Bangalore otherwise the consequences can take his life (at least for him). He knew his life was in danger, but from whom!?

After a long unsuccessful discussion and requests, he finally decided to catch the bus – which bus? To where? Neither he knows nor does he care. All he was worried about to get out the place as soon as possible. And there he was – an unknown bus to an unknown place but outside Bangalore. His heart beats were rising faster than ever until the driver started the engine. It was 3 AM, the bus was not even packed with passengers and besides it was about to cover the most dangerous highway but Raghav was relaxed.

Everything was normal back in the morning. He woke up with the first hit of the alarm and followed his regular routine; an hour long Puja, toast at breakfast and daily dose by his boss before lunch. But a regular lunch at a regular restaurant which changed everything.

'Hey! The bill!', eating Chinese food is not that tough as much as selecting any particular item of them is. The first day I entered this restaurant, I randomly chose this very fascinating Chinese item which they call Chop suey and I call fried noodles with extra tomato sauces, some ghas-phus and a half boiled omelet at the top. Though Ravi knew that Chop suey is my regular order, but even after that he keeps on bombarding the menu over my face; maybe it's because he wants his regular customer to try something more costly. But I was barely interested in other items. Chop suey was the only food item along with which they also used to serve a cookie at the end; fortune cookie, a Chinese snack invented by an American, which on cracking you'll find a small piece of paper rolled in it, defining your fortune; the best part for me at least.

And finally, the cookie with the bill arrived. I was eager to crack it more than swallowing it. The day was not that good as I always have wished it should be, so yes, I was eager to grab a clue of my coming hours. But cracking the cookie came out to be the worst thing ever happened to me. The paper was actually not defining my complete fortune, but my death.

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! IT WILL BE YOUR LAST DAY ON EARTH, IF YOU WILL NOT LEAVE THE CITY WITHIN 12 HOURS.

I have cracked more than 300 cookies in that restaurant, but never found anything like this before and that too in bold letters. It was like it wanted me not to ignore it and neither had I wanted to ignore it. Suddenly every single cookie I cracked before started rushing into my mind just to strengthen my thought of following the cookie.

Wear red, you'll find your love - positive

Don't be in touch with someone today, you'll find the peace - positive

.....

........

..........

The scan was supporting the cookie and gradually strengthening the fear of loss of life. I threw a 500 rupee note on the table and rushed from there without the change. I was feeling a void in myself, which was enough to block all the thoughts. I should be back to the office, but I wasn't. All I was feeling was just my heart beats pumping faster than ever. The next moment I realized that I was running... running faster than ever, thrashing the traffic and the people who were enjoying their life without any fear of death... without counting their days on earth. But I! Being aware of my death, I was still numb and running unknowingly where to go and how to save my ass.

My phone was ringing since I left the restaurant, but I didn't care to even check the caller ID. Suddenly every single matter on earth became meaningless to me; family, friends, career and love. It was my life which was important for me at that moment, beneath the fact that this life was not only of mine but it also belongs to many people... people who care for me... people for whom I was everything... for whom I have said million times that I can give my life for them. But all goes in vain with the parallel realization that these are just words to say. You will run for your life, but nobody else will, when it is at risk.

I was out of my breath, but I kept on running. It was fine in the morning, then what went wrong!? Everything was going good until I saw her. I should have taken another path to the office. A glimpse of her and here I was; running for my life. Though I tried to counter her ominous peak immediately the time I saw but it failed. Her ominous glimpse not only let my boss jump over me for getting late and made me sacked but also invited the death to my table. It’s sometimes really crazy to think about such a being, that is covered with black shiny hair and have sharp grey eyes, which looks not less than any beautiful creature on earth but tagged with ominous subjects. But it was! What if nobody had ever found or (if not wrong to say) patched her with ominous creature?! I guess I would have been enjoying my work at my office, thinking about how to spend the next weekend with Romana.

But I was here holding my breath and flowing with the cowishness of the people like a paper boat flowing downstream towards the waterfall.

The streets, vehicles running on it and people walking on it were scaring me to death. I was not responding to any known person calling me from the other side of the road. I was not passing nearby street stalls because it might happen that that hot oil might spill over me, I could slip on the knife which that lady is holding to cut the guavas for her customers, that man could kill me because he got jerked by me in between the cowish, that bus running on the street can get off from there and run over me. 

I wanted to cross the road and took the shortcut to my destination but I was afraid of everything. Since an hour, I was trying to cross the road; when it was not clear and even when it was clear. But my steps were jammed at the signal. Every step I was taking... every move I was making, the only thing flashing over my mind was just that small piece of paper wrapped up in oil saying that I am going to lose myself very soon.

I was insecure with every single matter on earth because somewhere, believe it or not, every single matter on this planet can harm you at any time accidentally or deliberately; be it a human being, be it an animal or be it any subject. Plotting all those fear into my mind, I decided not to take the cab or anything to reach my destination i.e. airport and stayed on the streets towards the airport. But it was impossible to do so, as the only way to the airport was from the other side of the road.

‘Sir, help me in crossing the road. Will you?’, I asked a man standing beside me on the zebra cross with my eyes on the vehicles waiting for the signal to turn into green .My body was totally under control of fear but I knew that standing on the signal or walking towards nowhere can only lead me to lose the time and my life, so the only option left with me was to ask someone’s help in crossing the road whether I wanted to take help or not. Yes! It was not enough to win over my fear and I don’t even wanted to as I was totally convinced that it has conquered me but 15 second tranquility was enough to reach my destination on time.

The man held my hand and started crossing the road over zebra cross. Between all these situations, my eyes were still with the vehicles at the signal and the signal itself. And finally I was there… the other side of the road.

‘Thank you, sir. God bless you’, suddenly the man who helped me there instead of taking thanks, gave the same to me. The other moment I realized that the man who was holding my hand… the man who was all the way with me while crossing the road was actually with a stick and wearing black glasses and he was blind! A blind person helped me but thanked me instead, so does it mean that all the way I was helping him in crossing the road!?

Between all these situations I almost forgot that the time was slipping away from my hand and instead of thinking much over the so called thankful scene, I directly rushed to the airport.

I should have known that the airport authority will not understand my situation. But all was OK now because I was on this bus which was heading towards somewhere outside Bangalore. I was never so much relaxed before. It was a feeling of winning over death and fear. I was looking on that small piece of paper due to which the past 10 hours came out to be the worst hours of my life and smiling on it. A winning smile!

Suddenly a forceful jerk pushed me harder towards the front of the bus where immediately I grabbed a seat to lock myself from falling. I felt the speed of the bus which was increasing with every second with my heart beats. The few counted people inside the bus started falling on each other and shouting. The other moment I realized that the bus came down from the highway towards the ditch. It was the ditch which made the bus go out of control, break free and limitless. I should be in fear… panicking but I wasn’t. I was falling from one seat to other. I could see the glasses cracking up. I could feel the crushing of the bus. I could see the blood coming out of head flowing towards my chin through my nose. But all I was thinking that I ran 12 hours to save my ass and finally when I felt that I won it over the death, I was here… here going downwards with anonymous high speed with the bus. I should be safe as I was finally out of the city and that too within 12 hours! But I wasn’t. I should be in my office but I let a piece of paper to decide my fate… fate which is always unpredictable. I looked on to my right hand which was grabbing the seat and laughed at the holy and astrological rings which I was wearing on it.

Right at there I understood a very truthful thi….

On 11th December, 2013, Supreme Court reversed the ruling of Delhi high court making homosexuality a criminal act. Gay sex is illegal and has now become a crime in this country where you can be punished with life imprisonment. In the world’s largest democracy and second most populated country, where we talk about advancement of the generation, uplifting marginalized of the society, of equality, and freedom of expression and where we also have discrimination against the sexual minorities.

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